Crazy

The cause and effect.

Oh how did I forget to put the honey on the womb that was the atonement to your aliveness? Your spliced solace 

Combined like terms

And you get I.

With you it was a mistake gone right.

A cold case found 

A rebound

Rebooting the hard drive we thought it was the sound.

It was.

Our truths not told so it was heard in third parties,

Lowly is the man who has nobody.

Friends forever broken down,

passion ignited was the beginning of the end to a union that was suppose to last forever.

Our forever was momentarily infinite.

Parasites to the mental capacity to see beyond our way of thinking left us like this.

 Creative mind ceased,

Yet the memory keeps the juices flowing.

Finding love in a hopeless place put me in a position to be truly loved.

To know what it felt like.

Life ain’t so easy as they say 

And situations ain’t so stationary as envoys 

I was employed

To invite you to a branch of lighthearted comfort and familiarity.

You served as an editor of what Self worth meant to me,

I see the God in me,

All thanks to you.

Appreciation is an understatement 

I appreciate this current present.

To love and be loved so perfectly aligned 

I never could of dream of such sweetness.

The cause and effect. 

Going through the dark to see the light.

You made it all possible.

I thank you for your wisdom.

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God forgive me for being lost

I’m addicted to the pain,
I’m convinced.
Wondering why I am attracted to the ones who doesn’t want to explore my mind but my body is optional for them.

I pick these men of valor who takes pride in what they have as their queen on their arm.
Yet I’m starting to feel like the peasant that they play with, throw crumbs at, and laugh to the sanctions of how naive she must is.

But in reality (in mine that is) I just love love.
Love the connection that intertwine two souls that become one,
Spiritual bonds as our temples are being explored.
I’m not sure if that’s the dictionary version of saying she’s gullible but I do know I’m feeling pretty restless.

When is it my turn to feel the undeniable touch of a person who desires forever with me?
More importantly, why must my internal state feel so lost without it?
Stevie wonder plays the soundtrack of my soul and yet I live a reality of being constantly turned down by the one I want to give my heart to.
Feeling overjoyed until I’m back where I started.
The plot is continuously congruent.
Where must I change at?
Where do I start?

God forgive me for being so lost.

perhaps I will drown in your sea

Let’s make believe your deceiving foibles were forgiven so we can live peaceably again.

My austere character has backbend into an extremist when I hear from you.

You have escaped my destructive path of hurting myself.

I wanted to feel your pain so badly, I’ve falter myself to be a like minded mini me version of yourself.

Because the end result is that I will always love you. I put my all in this deep ocean yet I came up for air.

The crumbs of our mistakes.

I can’t deal.
My feelings aren’t up for an appeal.
So they sit in this jail cell until they are serve its next meal.

What an obligation I have towards them.
See you can’t help who you love, and that’s the essence of it.
Don’t know what to do with these woes so I (try) to ignore them by playing games.
The same games that keeps our emotions caged.

If I crafted the words that the correctional officers dictated for me to leave this alone,
I could make a fishers net so you’ll always know theirs more of them in the sea…
However I’m someone you can call home.
Yet and still I have this detainer on my soul.
No entry to your goodness because you saw a leach on my phone,
Too worrisome of what my friends thought now Ill be living a dormant life on my own.

And I know what I can do to bring you to your knees.
I’m just not needed.
See God gave us eyes for us to see,
And I saw life on the outside through your docile spirit.
I just needed to be release by you simply giving me the keys…
I wake up thinking about your candor and I light up as if I see a way through this…
But then I see in this bed its only me…

When do commissary come?
Maybe I can write you again to make you finally feel undone.
I know I can, I just been doubting this love.
When I get out, the first thing I want to do is birth you a son.
To show the world what magic looks like,
To finally build us on a foundation that comes from our crumbs.
The crumbs of our mistakes.

From the chains that are on my feet,
To the crown of your head to the soul of your own feat.
I will stay in this confined area until I know we can go to trial with no chance of defeat.

my love,
You taught me how to be a woman.
Wait for me, I’ll be out soon.

Lost in my mind

…&& I have officially lost my mind.
This nigga got the hands of time,
Making my peacemaker utterly sublime.
Not quite sure if this is love or a crime,
But your tasty substance doesn’t need a lemon nor a lime
I’m intoxicated by your presence.
You asked me if I think of you…
Let me answer that in a couple of sentences::

‘My thoughts of you are there to drown the sea of frustration you ever feel,
I hope my hugs melt down your heart you signed and sealed
I pray my kisses give way to the fact that I will forever want you near’

No one will ever come close to the way you make me feel..
So invigorated…
So rejuvenating to my Mind I swear I can just fly
Question at hand is how could I still feel this strong about something that isn’t tangible right now?
Am I essentially losing my mind?
Maybe I like the way you blow me off,
Maybe I like how how you lied to me,
Maybe I love how you pay no attention to me…
I guess, if the finding of the facts are accurate, your just like me.